HOPE at the Salon

As a cosmetologist for over 24 years, I’ve heard many personal stories from clients. Relationships are key in this line of work. In my experience, like many other stylists, we often have deeply personal and intimate relationships with their clients. Clients will follow their stylist from salon to salon to maintain those relationships. I’ve sat with clients in tears as they’ve told me things they don’t or wouldn’t tell anyone else.  I often felt like an underpaid, underqualified therapist; listening to hardship, injustice, dilemmas, and more. I love my clients!

Salons are a hub of information and connections to the larger community. I’ve shared resources with my clients about upcoming community events, referrals to family serving organizations, community services that may be helpful, opportunities for service or other social connections. My clients sought my advice about what was available and how to be engaged in the community. If I didn’t know something, I would seek out the answer and add that knowledge to my own toolbox.

Beyond connecting clients to their larger community, salons are a welcoming place for people. They are clean and full of fragrance and life. People show up on their best days to get their hair done for prom or their wedding. Sometimes people show up on their worst days having just lost their job, their boyfriend broke up with them, they’re getting evicted, and their dog died and just want to start over with a fresh new look. It doesn’t matter what kind of day someone is having; the environment of the salon is a warm and inviting place. The goal is to leave the salon feeling better than when you arrived, knowing you want to come back.

The repeating refrain I heard from parents were the struggles and challenges they experienced raising kids. There are a lot of opportunities for emotional growth throughout parenting for both parent and child especially as children grow and developmental stages change. I have seen the emotional roller coaster my clients go through on their parenting journey. The initial adjustment to family life after giving birth and trying to figure out childcare. Sending kids to school for the first time and the overwhelming feelings of sadness or glee. The stress of dealing with developmental delays and IEPs and the sense of grief and loss that comes with the realization that life isn’t going to be what they planned. Hoping your kid doesn’t become a bully and worrying that they could be bullied. Playing referee and navigating sibling rivalries while trying to remain neutral. Dealing with infidelity or an unexpected pregnancy from parent or child. The elation of accomplishment and sigh of relief at high school and college graduations.

Parenting is hard work.

I LOVE doing hair and interacting with my clients. From very early in my hair stylist career I wrestled with wanting to do more to support children and families and promote positive change for communities. So, I pursued an undergraduate degree in Human Development and Family Studies and completed a master’s degree in Social Work. Now I have a better understanding of how positive and negative experiences shape brain development and how systems impact families.

Science teaches us that the more Positive Childhood Experiences (PCEs) children have the better health and mental health outcomes they have as adults–even in the midst of adversity. The four building blocks of HOPE, or Healthy Outcomes from Positive Experiences are Relationships, Environments, Engagement and Emotional Growth. This strengths based approach leads to positive outcomes for children and protects adult mental health. According to Tufts Medical Center, “Positive experiences can ease toxic stress and help children and youth grow into more resilient, healthier adults.”

Stylists who are HOPE informed would be better able to navigate hard conversations and provide research informed support to parents, building resilience and laying a HOPEful foundation for generations. Understanding HOPE could help stylists better relate to their clients and help their clients build and strengthen their relationships with their children. The salon environment is a model for parents to create a home environment where children feel safe and welcome.

As I mentioned previously, in addition to being a cosmetologist, I’m a social worker and HOPE certified trainer. I have the privilege and pleasure of infusing HOPE into the individual work I do. I’m passionate about children and families and part of my work is to elevate the message and science of HOPE as a tool for your toolbox. I work with schools, childcares, pediatricians, libraries, and a whole host of organizations statewide that serve parents. The goal of understanding the HOPE framework is to see how you are already doing some of this foundational work that strengthens families and integrate the building blocks of HOPE in a more intentional way into the work you do.

Our work at the Idaho Children’s Trust Fund (ICTF) promotes the building blocks of HOPE and the five Protective Factors which are: parental resilience, social connections, knowledge of parenting and child development, social and emotional competence of children, and concrete support in times of need. These Protective Factors and building blocks of HOPE promote optimal development so children, families, and communities thrive. If you would like to learn more about HOPE, Protective Factors and organizations grounded in these frameworks, want to get involved in the Strengthening Families movement, or share your HOPEful story, contact the Idaho Children’s Trust Fund.